tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5173194894567878421.post8382533734692516656..comments2023-04-17T03:34:05.553-07:00Comments on From the Mind of...: The First Day of FinalsUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger11125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5173194894567878421.post-84977015157572949782010-06-26T09:25:12.354-07:002010-06-26T09:25:12.354-07:00I'm late with this reply, but felt I had to re...I'm late with this reply, but felt I had to respond. Tyler, it sounds to me like your issues with being gay come from others, not yourself, and I think that's a good place to be in actually. If YOU thought that gay people were this or that, blah blah blah, it would be hard for any of us to help you, because that acceptance needs to come from you. But YOU are fine with the idea of gay people, you just realize that other people will put you down for it, and you don't want that. To be blunt, fuck them. Now, some people will just need time to adjust, and will get past seeing you as gay to seeing you as you, but other people won't, and you don't need people like that. Like you, I had a tough time in elementary school, and I spent a lot of time worrying about what others thought, and about how I was percieved. I am now at a point in my life where I am (mostly) past that. I am who I am, and if people want to label that, I can't control it. I'm happy with who I am, and I think that I'm a good person. I can't tell you how to get to that point, but you will get there. <br />It's not so much pride about being gay, but proud that you accept who you are, and that there isn't anything wrong with who you are. I'm not proud per se because I am a biological female, but I am proud that I am a woman, and don't see myself as less (or more) than a man. <br />Hope that helps.Madeleinehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16723371183468886299noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5173194894567878421.post-90015350443454175442010-06-25T09:16:04.765-07:002010-06-25T09:16:04.765-07:00I had a second piece of wisdom on being proud abou...I had a second piece of wisdom on being proud about being gay and I think this kinda of sums it up for me. This is from a blog called Joe.My.God and he writes about pride parades (http://joemygod.blogspot.com/2010/06/watching-defectives.html) but this is the part I relate to:<br /><br />"A co-worker of mine heard me discussing my Pride plans last weekend and said, "I really don't understand what it is you are proud about. I mean, you all say that you are born that way, so it's not like you accomplished anything." She wasn't being mean, just genuinely curious, and I think that a lot of gay people probably feel the same way. On this subject, I can only speak for myself.<br /><br />I'm proud because I'm a middle-aged gay man who has more dead friends than living ones and yet I'm not completely insane. I've lived through a personal Holocaust (here we go again) in which my friends and lovers have been mowed down as thoroughly and randomly as the S.S guards moved down the line of Jews. You, dead. You, to the factory. And you, you, you, and you, dead. I am inexplicably alive and I am proud that I keep the memories of my friends alive. I am proud of my people, the ACT-UPers, the Quilt makers, the Larry Kramers, the Harvey Fiersteins. I'm proud that I'm not constantly curled up into a ball on my bed, clutching photo albums and sobbing. And that happens sometimes, believe it.<br /><br />And outside of my personal experiences, I am proud of my tribe as a group. Sometimes I think that gay people are more creative, more empathic, more intuitive, more generous, and more selfless than anybody else on the planet."<br /><br />For myself, I'm proud that I'm a middle aged gay man that has come to terms with his sexual identity, has found great friends (straight and gay), become successful and respected in a challenging professional while living openly and honestly. <br /><br />You see it is not as much about being proud that you're gay but realizing that you were given a more difficult road to travel and being proud that overcame the challenges to be happy.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5173194894567878421.post-10202926371019974202010-06-25T08:48:27.006-07:002010-06-25T08:48:27.006-07:00Tyler, it will get better. I wanted to share a lit...Tyler, it will get better. I wanted to share a little piece of wisdom that I picked up from a PFLAG mom. She used to be upset when her son came out because he was different from the other gay people that she had seen and she was worried that he would change. She said one day she realized: "I kept trying to put the face of the gay community on my son. Then I realized that my son was the face of the gay community." Her a-ha moment was the realization gay didn't define her son but her son defined gay. It is a powerful thought if you think about it. <br /><br />People won't suddenly think they should start buying Diana Ross CDs if you don't let them. One day, I was chatting with one of the firefighters with whom I work and he joked that I never gave them a choice about accepting I was gay. I asked what he meant and he said that I basically said "I'm gay. I'm fucking good at my job and you know it. So if you have an issue with it, tough shit. Now, can we please just get back to work." <br /><br />My point is that you have the ability to set the tone for what people think of you. Right now in my department, people volunteer to ride with me and crews tell new people to get on my shifts because I'm one of the best EMTs in the department. Especially, as you get older, people will look past the idea that you're gay to just seeing what you contribute to their team and they'll deal with you how you want them to deal with you.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5173194894567878421.post-74688810493825763322010-06-24T01:45:48.004-07:002010-06-24T01:45:48.004-07:00@Paul
Thanks. It only makes sense to be around pe...@<a href="#c182728030190608972" rel="nofollow">Paul</a><br /><br />Thanks. It only makes sense to be around people who will accept you yet I stick with people who may or may not. I guess we will need to find out.Tylerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11031244464214463287noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5173194894567878421.post-32866423368718721262010-06-24T01:44:23.683-07:002010-06-24T01:44:23.683-07:00@Austin
Thanks for the input. It helps. It keeps ...@<a href="#c4526523378891286029" rel="nofollow">Austin</a><br /><br />Thanks for the input. It helps. It keeps me from gong crazy so thats good. lol.Tylerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11031244464214463287noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5173194894567878421.post-53984087561880650812010-06-24T01:40:13.942-07:002010-06-24T01:40:13.942-07:00@socrkid17
Im glad you can relate. It makes us al...@<a href="#c6650850363199991277" rel="nofollow">socrkid17</a><br /><br />Im glad you can relate. It makes us all feel a bit better when we know we all suffer the same eh? that sounds so wrong but thats just about it. Keep it up man. Youre doing fine im sure.Tylerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11031244464214463287noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5173194894567878421.post-64444084558165120982010-06-24T01:36:43.278-07:002010-06-24T01:36:43.278-07:00@Taylor
Merci beaucoup Taylor. Vous êtes une bonn...@<a href="#c4622186626097616776" rel="nofollow">Taylor</a><br /><br />Merci beaucoup Taylor. Vous êtes une bonne personne! Je vous remercie de votre soutien.<br /><br />(it took me forever to get the accent over the e but I figured it out!)<br /><br />Dans l'amitié<br />TylerTylerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11031244464214463287noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5173194894567878421.post-1827280301906089722010-06-23T19:43:03.701-07:002010-06-23T19:43:03.701-07:00I agree with Austin just be yourself. Those who ar...I agree with Austin just be yourself. Those who are true friends will like/love you for who you are. Not some perception of you that you let down by telling theater truth. It's on them for making that assumption to begin with.Paulhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16887579337378695820noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5173194894567878421.post-45265233788912860292010-06-23T13:17:23.881-07:002010-06-23T13:17:23.881-07:00Dude,
You have no obligation to prove yourself to...Dude,<br /><br />You have no obligation to prove yourself to anyone. You are you, whatever that means. If others want to decide that means X instead of Y, that's their right - just as it's their right to be completely batshit wrong.<br /><br />On the "pride" note - I'm not "proud to be gay". That isn't, really, what it's about. I'm just me - and I have no problem being me in any situation. Part of that "me" is gay, just like parts of it are a computer geek, a poet, a photographer, etc. I have pride in the fact that I don't let myself be psychologically manhandled by others who think I should conform to their standards, but I've never been "proud" of being gay. That's like being proud of being tall: you have no control it, so what's there to be proud of?<br /><br />Just be you - and yes, I know that "just" is really difficult. But that's what matters.Austinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15289493499922076048noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5173194894567878421.post-46221866260976167762010-06-22T23:53:50.370-07:002010-06-22T23:53:50.370-07:00Tyler, Nous sommes la pour vous. J'espere que ...Tyler, Nous sommes la pour vous. J'espere que vous vous sentez mieux. Tu es le plus grand! Gardez la tete haute. <br /><br />j'adore!TBhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02085163800976165758noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5173194894567878421.post-66508503631999912772010-06-22T22:45:31.903-07:002010-06-22T22:45:31.903-07:00man, I could of not said it better myself. Im glad...man, I could of not said it better myself. Im glad you posted this cause this is exactly how i feel!! like its crazy. i honestly think we all go through the same stages growing up being gay. i tried forcing myself to like girls in middle school. in highschool, would always have a date to homecoming and prom and would always play it off like i was into them. i know its bad to act and deceive people but its what we do to fit in which sucks. sooooooo many of my friends would be surprised if i came out and maybe some might not even be my friends and thats why its hard to accept it. i want to read the gay handbook saying gays cant be good at sports. seems like all guys thinks gays are pussys and cant be athletic.<br /><br />and i know i could play the role of a gay guy acting straight. probs get a grammy :) lolsocrkid17https://www.blogger.com/profile/11555526517181969629noreply@blogger.com