Friday, September 3, 2010

my mother knows me too well

After all she is my mother but its hard to keep cool when shes trying to figure me out. Its even harder when she starts playing J Edgar Hoover and poking and prodding then calling my bluff. She can totally tell when im lying and thats making her scary at the moment. She can read my body language like a book and that doesn't help when she comes home and Im tutoring my crush and for the most part my subconscious seems to have full control over my body.

For the most part im able to keep relatively cool around my crush. I feel that melty happy sensation all over when he's near and I come close to losing it but I dont lose it. Add my mother to the equation and suddenly I know im being read and I start losing my cool. I cant say why but when ever my parents are lurking about I cant relax as easy. Of course she lurked around in the kitchen (I was tutoring him the little dinning room thing within eye shot of the kitchen) far longer than normal watching me like a hawk as she put away groceries and randomly changed the position of a hand towel. All the while Im trying to help the crush and stay cool while she questioningly looks on and pretends shes not.

He left our house but he left his pen and notebook behind (hmm) I texted him and told him. A good 15 minutes later I got excited to see his name in my inbox. "Oh darn. Ill come back in a few" he said.
My mom instantly began asking me questions.

Let me step back a bit. I am not the sort who goes way out of my way to help people with school work. I will help people, but not to the extent that Ive been helping this crush of mine and my mom picked up on that real quick.

"Is he giving you drugs?"
"yeah mom does he really look that sketchy?"
"do you like his sister or something?"
hahaha " stop"

she stopped. Then he came back to pick his stuff up he came to the door and I answerd it and told him Id go to my room and get his stuff (id moved it there to inspect it just incase there was some type of love note inside so I could keep it away from my moms prying eyes. Im hopeful okay) I made the mistake of being kind and letting him in because my mother swooped in like a hawk. I could hear her from my room.
"do you have any siblings?"
"yeah. a younger brother"
That got me to sprint over and break those two up. I walked him out to his waiting ride and gave him both my note book and his. Mine so he can copy the necessary notes. Yeah. Im letting him copy me. If you knew me like everybody you would know its absolutely out of character for me to let somebody copy my work. I let my crush through that boundary though because hes A) cute above all things B) I know he can be trusted C) ive gotta let him in somehow and hes deserving enough.

I read some body language out there on the drive way. I hate to make assumptions about this guy but its hard not to. He seems to enjoy chatting. I was trying hard not to melt on my driveway. He took both note books, complimented my house, then with a friendly reach slightly out of his way because im standing just a bit more than his arms length away from him. I patted my shoulder and gave it a bit of a squeeze that got my heart rate fluttering. Even when he stumbled slightly in doing it he was overly adorable.

Sunday he returns for more tutoring fun...lunch perhaps?

J Edgar (my mom) hopefully wont be giving us a hard time. She likes him...just seems suspicious about how im so good to him. She always tells me which of my friends she thinks are good looking. Its kinda...very creepy but the crush gets her seal of approval. You know its good when its mom good.

"coffee crisp... it makes a nice light snack" (sorry it needed to go here)

alright enough Mummy/crush talk.

Sunday Sunday Sunday




  1. lol interesting. well moms always know when their suns are gay, even if they don't want to accept it.

    Crushes like this are really tricky. We like to read a lot into things, because we are looking for signs and stuff to confirm/deny if theyre gay or not. Good luck!!


  2. ya i definetely kno that melty feeling too. like u just wanna reach out and caress his adorable face as u look on. like this one time i confronted a super cute police officer in singapore... god he was cute.

    he forgot his notebook?... lol did u guys do anything after the tutoring or something?

  3. ha! moms..... they know way more than they ever let on...sometimes it makes them act all nosy and crazy, especially when they know too much and realize that they do.... moms... theyre a puzzle... i love my mom...

    - cheers.. david

  4. Dude you're fuckin hilarious. Maybe I'm just stoned but the way you write things make me laugh.

    That's legit you get to spend time with your "friend." Think there's any chance he plays for our team?

  5. Knowing that something is up isn't just a talent of parents - as a kid I knew when my parents were hiding something or lying to me. Your mom may know that something is up but not know what it is, which must be frustrating for her.

    I hope that yesterday's tutoring went well.